February 2012
87 posts
Watchomfg
tiffanyfocks:
do you ever see someone and think oh my god i would like to be responsible for your next orgasm
Anonymous asked: I went trough every single page on here. You are hilarious.
we watched political debates in class today and it made me really wanna get an ownership over rick santorum so he has to ask for my permission to talk
at my funeral i want my hand to be held up so when people walk up to see me they can give me a high five for all my successful text posts
do you guys think chris brown ever accidentally says “nice to beat you… i mean nice to meet you!” when he first meets someone? i would
please help i cant take it off repeat call the...
Watcheveryone just stays in place omg
8888888boobmuffins asked: I like yo blog. I think I have said this before. whats up lady.
things i miss about my ex boyfriend:
his dog
as long as there aren’t any spiders in hell count me in
and the oscar ghost to whitney houston
Anonymous asked: Is one of your fingers missing?
1 tag
does anyone have a plan to kill those guys from lmfao or do i have to do everything myself
do you guys ever get dressed up to go out and have fun but then just change back into your lazy clothes and jump back into bed because you remember no one likes you
me and this new kid at my school are taking things slow like real slow we haven’t even met yet
wittlehoodrat asked: i am on page 50 of your blog after 1 hour and i am crying hysterically because i can't stop laughing thank you for being alive
1 tag
Watchshitthisway:
cinnamon challenge montage featuring your faves
Radio by Lana Del Rey
flynnizard:
its funny how we’ll give food to ducks but not to homeless people
has anyone actually clicked the “tell me more” on youtube or google to read about the new privacy policy? there’s a cookie recipe at the bottom
amenpenis:
Scientific Attempt To Create Most...
“try again you fucking dumbass”
– squiggly red line under the word you spelled wrong
ineedtogetpaid:
“i hate my life” the angry blogger types on their 15” macbook pro on their king sized bed in their air conditioned 3 story home in suburban america.
if you’re ever going through my computer and you see a folder named “school studying” dont click it because that’s definitely not school studying
haha thanks apple for having autocorrect i bet my grandpa really wanted to know that i miss going fisting with him and not fishing you assholes
pukkke:
if morgan freeman goes to jail is he just morgan man
for every like this gets tumblr will donate 2 dollars to my bank account because i suffer from a deadly disease called homosexuality like this if you have a heart
school goes by really fast when you don’t even show up and just sleep all day instead
Watchwhat omg
lustofthelion:
Read More
omg carly is that what you do on your spare time
if kim kardashian and nicki minaj were both drowning and i had to save one of them, i’d probably just go home and take a nap
i just realized i forgot to go to church this morning oh darn that’s like… 17 years in a row what a shame
the way I type on tumblr: assntitties lololol rkejwhlkjdhlwkjerhwer I can't even with all these feels
the way I write for class: Under this assumption, it is safe to dictate in a clear and particularly concise way that the author not only felt the need to illustrate the background surrounding the mortifying, yet tragic, action that pushes forward the engaging plot, but also the background of the reader's very own heart.
my dad found a list of boys i’ve hooked up with and i just told him they were just names of guys in my chemistry class but the ‘drunk guy at jr prom’ kind of killed it
omfg im seriously at a restaurant standing in line behind a bunch of fat people at a buffet do they not realize there is NO line at the salad bar
“im never drinking again”
– people who will drink again
hot guy in the elevator: going down?
me: i wish
plutobabyy asked: hahaha just saw your url and i laughed forever. :)
i don’t know how i feel about that “every kiss begins with k” commercial all my kisses begin with a lot of alcohol hmm
why did my grandma get me a late happy valentines day present like hello do you know the law obviously im not gonna sleep with you grandma
me: can i have a breakfast mcmuffin
mcdonalds: will that be egg or sausage?
me: yes
mcdonalds: yes what?
me: yes please
1 tag
Teacher: Please write down a famous quote that you know and who wrote it.
Me: "It does not matter how slow you go so long as you do not stop." - Confucius.
1612th:
if i ever have a really hot teacher i’m gonna write “yes please” on tests where it says “Date” so i can creep him out
christianmingle:
i love when attractive people raise their hand to speak in class because then i can stare at them and just pretend like i care about what they have to say
Watchwait what the fuck
i saw a sign that said “watch for falling rocks” and i had nothing to do anyway so i waited for like an hour and i never saw anything wtf??